The Snow Snayk
There are many frightening legends—the Loch Ness Monster, the Abominable Snowman, Sasquatch. But the most frightening to all skiers is the Snow Snayk. Yes, folks, this horrifying creature have brought great embarrassment to skiers worldwide. Unlike its horrible brethren, it has not confined itself to one specific area of the globe. It manages to find skiers everywhere!
All TSCers should be aware of this obnoxious and potentially dangerous creature. Due to its snow-white scales, it is impossible to see, especially through bloodshot eyes following the previous evening’s activities. Be advised, it preys mainly on those who lost their remaining brain cells at the bar the night before. Additionally, this creature has no pity for the skier near lift lines, T-Bars, or crowded slopes. If you are a beginning skier take heed. The white serpent will take an easy catch over the faster, more agile advanced skier. But no one is truly safe!
You’ll have the dubious distinction of winning the Snow Snayk Award if you meet the creature and your fellow TSCers feel it was the most spectacular or amusing fall of the trip.
The famous sentence, “I’m not complaining, I’m just making an observation,” would qualify one as a Wanker. On every trip it seems there is always someone who just refuses to be happy. Should you be that person and happen to express just how dissatisfied you are, you may win the dubious distinction of the trip Wanker. It’s okay, you can complain, no one’s going to stop you, BUT, remember, you might win the Wanker Award.
When you really pay attention, you realize people say some very silly things! Keep your ears open while on TSC trips for those funny, strange, obnoxious, obscene, and sometimes down-right dumb quotable quotes. Unfortunately, so often the best funny, strange, obnoxious, obscene, and down-right dumb quotes are heard when no one else is around, forcing you to laugh and make fun of the offender on your own.
Do not despair!
As Tannenbaumers are always looking for ways to make fun of their fellow club members, all in jest of course, we set aside a special time on the bus ride home for you to share the “funny” with the entire group. Our Trip Quotes time is a cross between story time and show-and-tell, but better because there’s no teacher to yell at you for making fun of your friends. It will provide you the opportunity to let everyone know just how “smart” our fellow Tannenbaumers really are.
Ever since the first person strapped wooden planks to his feet, there has existed a tribe of skiers with a passion for the sport second to none. But like all loves, this one is blinding. They continuously get disoriented and lost on the slopes! Due to their lack of direction, the tribe has dispersed itself throughout mountainous regions around the world. TSC is aware that there are a few great-grandchildren of this tribe on many of the slopes in Europe. You will immediately recognize them when you hear their shrill cry, “WHERETHEFUCOWEE!?”
In honor of this legendary tribe, we recognize TSC members displaying the same lack of directional sense. The Fucowee Award is given to the individual on each trip who becomes lost, loses something of value (tangible or intangible), or becomes disoriented…much to everyone’s amusement, of course!